


The dance of two hearts

by Lets_Queer_Things_Up



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alphonse is thE VOICE OF REASON, Alphonse is the best at feelings out of them all, Edward also is terrible at doing feelings, F/M, Help I've fallen into the Royai and I can't get up, Parental Riza Hawkeye, Parental Roy Mustang, Post-Promised Day, Protective Riza Hawkeye, Protective Roy Mustang, Riza can't do feelings, Roy can't do feelings, Royai - Freeform, ah there's this mild panic attack scene in the first chapter but it's mild seriously, listen i've been up past 5am for the last few nights just thinking about Royai - lemme have it, some Edwin in the background
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:35:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29042493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lets_Queer_Things_Up/pseuds/Lets_Queer_Things_Up
Summary: After regaining my sight, I just wanted to get to Ishval do do the right thing. Of course, as Roy Mustang things just can't go the way I'd like them to, and starting from a celebration in Resembool, through a sudden change from Grumman as Furher to war trials, I just can't seem to catch a single break.The fact that most of my subordinates have began betting on when I'll finally ask my right hand woman out does not help with the headache I'm getting.I'm definitely going to die young at this rate.
Relationships: Edward Elric/Winry Rockbell, Riza Hawkeye & Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang
Kudos: 10





	The dance of two hearts

“This feels… different.” Fuery’s comment rang in the almost empty car of the train. I was not quite sure why I felt as nervous as I did, tho I guess Fuery’s words summed it up pretty well.  
“Of course it feels different. It is different.” Havoc didn’t even look up from his box of cigarettes, which he continuously opened, closed and shuffled between his hands. I guess we were all nervous. Some just hid it better.  
My gaze slowly took in all the information around me, from the beautiful view of the countryside outside the window to the oh so familiar faces of my team. Fuery staring out of the window as I had a few moments prior, Breda who somehow fell asleep, and Havoc were sitting opposite of me, and I could see the top of Falman’s hair above Riza’s head. This part of my life was something I had to get used to again. In the end it has only been a few days since Doctor Marcoh had successfully reversed both Havoc’s injury as well as my blindness, and we were both having some trouble getting back to the way we used to live our lives.  
Some nights I’d almost panic when upon opening my eyes I couldn’t immediately see, and my eyes would hurt when it was too bright wherever I was. He got tired after taking a few steps and was thrown off balance more easily than in the past.  
“You do realise it’s rude to stare, Sir?” Hawkeye didn’t even bother looking up from the book she was reading although there was no malice in her voice. Feeling a small smirk tug on the corner of my lips, I couldn’t help but reply.  
“Well, I am sure Doctor Marcoh wouldn’t mind me using my sight to focus on the most beautiful person in my entourage, Lieutenant.”  
“Firstly, I’m pretty sure Black Hayate is currently with Rebecca in Central. Secondly, please don’t make my job of protecting you harder by forcing me to help you go blind again, _Sir_.” The tone of her voice made it obvious that this was not the way she wanted this conversation to go, and I felt a pang of guilt. I’ve made that woman go through Hell, the least I could do is give her some peace of mind when she wants to read a book. Without speaking I shifted my gaze towards the landscape again, and the closer we got to Resembool the bigger the pit in my stomach grew. I knew that I shouldn't be this nervous.  
Except that I had all the reasons for that.  
When I last saw Fullmetal I hadn’t gone through the Gate of Truth. Alphonse was still stuck in an armour body and I was sure they both disliked me now. Or they were about to. In the end, I shamelessly used a philosopher’s stone to regain my eyesight, and cure Havoc. While these two have done their damned best to never resort to such a cheap tactic after figuring out what it was made of.  
While I didn’t give a fuck about what most people thought of me, as difficult as it was to admit, these brothers were not ‘most people’ to me anymore. Clenching my fists I hoped the rest of my team didn’t take notice of my nervous tick. Either they truly didn’t or they just didn’t want to frustrate me.  
I hadn’t even have the time to let the brother know about the operations - as I got a call from Edward only yesterday where he basically threatened to pluck my "as useless as the rest of me" eyes out if we didn’t come to Resembool the following day. He claimed he just wanted to have a get together with the people whom had helped him and Alphonse on their journey, but later the same day Lieutenant had gotten the shortest call from Winry yet. “Edward’s birthday.”  
So, the entire team spent the entire yesterday evening carefully preparing a card for his birthday - we had no clue what he’d want now that he had his body and his brother back, and a card seemed appropriate. I also had bought some liquor - he was turning eighteen after all.  
Once at Resembool, we decided to start by sropping our luggage off. Once it had been left in the tiny motel not too far from the station, we turned towards the place we knew the Elrics were. With every step towards the Rockbell’s place I felt a dizziness in my head as the pit in my stomach increased.  
“Colonel?” Riza’s voice was barely audible as she found herself next to me, her eyes laced with concern. The rest of my team were only a few steps ahead.  
“Go on - it’s nothing.” Her eyes made it clear she didn’t believe me, and as the rest of the team obeyed my orders - she didn’t. Instead, she only came closer, the worry now more apparent on her face. While it was not as prominent as on Promised Day, it was more obvious than usually. With a grunt I leaned against a tree, a sweat breaking out. Wordlessly, Riza searched my face for answers without asking any specific question, but I knew what she wanted.  
“They will hate me now, won’t they?” My voice was more silent and hoarse than before. I did my best to breathe deeply - the way Maes taught me after Ishval. That didn’t work. There were too many thoughts. I could picture them both with hate in their eyes. Hell, I could picture my own teammates with these expressions of hate. Tears started to prickle at my eyes. _God how I hate myself_.  
When Riza wrapped her arms around me, all I waned to do was to hug her back, to bury my head in her shoulder and weep. I couldn’t do that. Sure, this wasn’t Central or even East City - but the uniforms were still a dead giveaway. I couldn’t risk endangering our hard work even for a second. However, thanks to her hug, my heart stopped racing, and I could think more clearly now. Hawkeye let me go, as if sensing my initial panic was slowly giving way to my usual cool demeanour.  
“I highly doubt that. Wasn’t Edward outraged that you were unjustly blinded?” Her voice was calm, so was her expression but the way she looked at me was enough for me to understand all the words she couldn’t say out loud. Slowly standing up, I could only muster to mention with my head that we should get going. Even though there were no more words exchanged - I knew it was alright. We somehow managed to catch up to the rest of my teammates, Havoc’s lack of strength in legs was both a blessing and a curse.  
When we arrived, some unknown to me guy opened the door. Blonde hair, cut very short, golden eyes. It took me a moment to realise whom he might be.  
“Alphonse?” He looked so small. Like Fullmetal. I guess their age showed that way. Still, even compared with Fullmetal he was smaller. Years of being on the other side, I guess. When our eyes met, his widened in shock, before he closed them, grinning like an idiot, and before I could fully process what I was seeing tears welled up in my eyes again. I saluted him, smiling softly. Now I was so glad Marcoh had given me my sight back. Seeing Alphonse safe and sound was so much more than I deserved.  
We somehow all ended up in the living room, hopefully Edward wasn’t as dumb as to invite all of his friends at once - tho he claimed he would do that soon enough. The liquor I bought had been opened, and despite being underage even Alphonse got a taste of it.  
“So, Colonel. I see that despite your efforts you’re still far from the title of Fuhrer. Just how bad are you at achieving your goals?” The older brother grinned in such a wicked way I was reconsidering asking Riza to shoot my eyes out. Trying my best not to let that brat get to me, I decided to shoot his remark down.  
“I know this may sound weird to you, Halfmetal but some of us are capable of holding more than one plan and goal at once.” The growl from his side sounded so familiar and comforting I couldn’t help but glance in his direction with a smile.  
I was so dumb to believe these two would truly end up having me for choosing a different path from them. Hawkeye will have every right to chew me out later on.  
One by one most of my men started going back to the motel. A part of me wanted to go too, especially since I was not sure how Hawkeye felt, and she refused to leave my side. However, I could also tell that both Elrics had something they wanted from me.  
It wasn’t until Winry excused herself that they’d gotten down to business.  
“So. Mustang. Your sight didn’t magically come back in your sleep, did it?” Edward’s eyes were piercing, Alphonse’s stare not much different.  
“No. Doctor Marcoh proposed using a philosopher’s stone,” each passing moment of silence was as draining as a moment during the genocide. I knew they were judging me. Hell, I was judging myself. Still, I did not agree to Marcoh’s proposition just to regret it later, “We are currently working with Scar and Major Miles. We’re going to restore Ishval. I do realise that taking the stone had been incredibly selfish. I do not plan on changing your mind about that.” I looked up at them, expecting to see anger. They both had some tears in their eyes, and their lips trembled slightly. I silently begged Hawkeye to help me out, and as if reading my silent plea she sat next to Alphonse, and let his head fall onto her shoulder. I decided to mimic her but with Ed, seeing how Alphonse reacted accordingly. Of course Fullmetal just wasn’t about to let me show compassion, opting to push me away. He got up and walked away. Feeling guilty, I battled my thoughts for a few minutes - when he came back to punch me in the face. What a good thing he didn’t have an arm of steel anymore.  
“Oh good. That feels better.” His dry comment might’ve angered me if it was on any other subject, however this time I understood his anger too well to truly upset me. Nonetheless, I could feel Hawkeye helping me stand up and Alphonse brought me a bag of ice to avoid a bruise from forming.  
“Don’t get me wrong. I get that you didn’t deserve to get your eyesight taken from you. Still, I wish you would’ve chosen another way… Though I am glad to see you see, Colonel. ” Edward admitted, pacing around the living room. The last sentence was said in a more quiet tone - as if he wasn't full to admit it it out loud. I couldn't blame him.  
“So did I. However, there was more than just me. I wanted Havoc to regain feeling in his legs as well. I am aware that I cannot bring these poor souls back. You guys are the ones who told me human transmutation does not work. However, If I use my eyes not only for the good of Amestris but for Ishval too, I feel that it might be the best way to repay them.” My eyes met with two pairs of golden ones: one cold and the other one warm. Next to me, the Lieutenant’s eyes were looking at me more softly than I deserved.  
“Well. Whatever done is done. No use dwelling in the past. You two better get back to the motel. You’re still expected to come tomorrow.” Edward’s words bring me to my feet, My aide immediately by my side. As I bid adieu with the brothers, I could see that despite the truth of my sight they weren’t hateful. At least not yet.  
The walk back with her was calm. There was practically no need for words between us anyway, and I cannot remember the last time when there was such a need.  
“I’m sorry.” Glancing in her direction I could tell she knew what I meant. Her expression remained unchanged, although there was a more pink tint to her cheeks - most likely due to alcohol than anything else.  
“Hey Hawkeye, what was your biggest wish when you were young?” I stopped walking and looked up at the sky. Unlike in Central or East - here I could see the stars. My aide stood a step behind me - probably used to it as my bodyguard.  
“I’m not sure I follow your train of thoughts.” She most likely didn’t want to talk about it, or she might’ve been more affected by the drink than she lead on. I’ve decided to turn to her, to repeat the question - but seeing her illuminated by the stars was enough for my voice to die out. All I could was marvel at her beauty, forgetting about the world around and inside me.  
“Sir, how many times do I have to remind you that staring is rude?” There was a smile I haven’ t seen in a long while on her face. Every inch of my body was aching and burning to hug her, kiss her or just even touch her. These sorts of feelings have been appearing in me after Promised Day. I guess almost losing her so many times had to bite me in the ass one of these days.  
“Do you remember what was your most important wish before Ishval?” The warmth of her smile seemed to disappear, as she took a step closer towards me, and mentioned with her head to continue walking.  
“I think I wanted to have a family, Sir,” I wasn’t actually expecting her to answer, “although these plans are all gone now.” _You don’t believe you deserve any good thing in your life now_. She didn’t have to admit the last part. I knew the sentiment all too well.  
My thoughts went back to the Promised Day - when the creature the Homonculi called Father talked about the cruelty of the truth. It took away Al’s body for wanting his mother's warmth, Ed’s brother for wating his family back, my vision for envisioning a better future for this country. Even though Riza was no alchemist - it seemed like in a similar way she’d been stripped of what she wished for, and the possibility of achieving this old dream of hers.  
If I had a cenz for every wave of guilt washing over his conscience, I could've lent Edward enough money to buy a new house.  
Even though she could’ve asked me about my question she never did. In silence we got to the motel and our respective rooms, sharing only a glance for our goodbye.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so I'm currently in the middle of my exam session so my mind decided to stay up past 5 am thinkinig of Royai 🙃  
> I hope you guys will enjoy it!  
> I'd be grateful for any comment or kudo


End file.
